Deleted
He deleted me…it’s what I’ve been wanting but it still hurts that he actually did it. I have to stay strong because we weren’t compatible….but why do I still want him so?
Goodbyes are never easy!
I know you’re done…I can tell by how easily you can let me go & it’s ok…it’s what I’ve been waiting for…it still hurts like hell but it really is the best! I think you’ve found that one who can replace me…I hope you & her treat each other well…and compliment each other!
My heart is breaking right now! Good bye!
Why…
Why do I continue to go back cause afterwards I am always the one getting hurt & left feeling empty!
Thoughts
The thought that you’re waking up with someone hurts but that same thought while I was with you killed me! :(
why…
i don’t get why…why did you want me back if you really weren’t willing to do the work? you could hae your freedom and live how you wanted….i know you’re out tonight, when you said you weren’t….you lie about everything….just take care of yourself…enjoy it…i can’t make you happy the way you should…
head games…
you’re making it very clear you don’t want this…you should just tell me…it’s totally ok…you are entitled to be happy and be where you want to be…if this isn’t it then tell me just don’t try to push me to the point where i do it…if there’s someone else…then go for it…just please tell me…
crazy
you honestly make me crazy…i don’t know when i’m coming or going…i want so badly to believe in you…but it’s hard when you don’t make it easy.
what would be better is if this isn’t where you want to be you should just tell me and i will set you free…as hard as it may be…i would get it…
you may say i could do the same thing…but the truth is…this is where i want to be…with you but i want you to be true to me as i am to you….
You know….
Another night I’m up & upset…and another night you’re asleep. Not a care in the world….I guess that alone should tell me how you really feel about me…I honestly believe there’s someone else in your life right now or you want the freedom to explore your options…if that’s the case….ok but tell me. Yes I’ll be hurt but I’ll get it. You’re young & you want to go and see the world…. you just need to tell me….
i hate that i feel this way…
you called and said you’re going to el torito for a birthday thing for a “girl” friend…it can be totally innocent but it gives me a sick feeling in my stomach…the first thing that comes to mind is…are you going on a date? double date with H?? idk!!! it doesn’t really feel good…. then the other side of me tries really hard to believe that it is just a dinner with friends for someone’s birthday….if you had earned my trust it wouldn’t be a big deal…but you’ve made it really clear that it’s really not something you care about…i just have to deal with it.
and it’s frustrating to me….
then you add the we’re only spending wed-fri together now today…when this weekend you said i could chose…and i chose fri-sun…then yesterday you made it seem like we were gonna spend our usual together and then you spring the new 3 days together…it’s frustrating because i work those days…i only get half days with you…i always look forward to my weekends with you…
thinking about that makes me frustrated because cause the suspicious side of me says are you contemplating spending the time based on how well your date goes tonight? what is it that you are trying to go do this weekend? are is she giving you problems about not going out with her at night? maybe you 2 only hang out during the days these days? and you’re trying to prove to her how much she means to you? if that’s the case you should really just cut me loose…it’ll hurt but i should be your back burner…you’re definitely not my back burner…
right now my heart hurts a little cause el torito closes at 10 and you said you’re gonna call when you’re leaving….if you don’t or if you don’t have a good reason for calling late…then it will be really hard for me to believe what you are telling me…
ugh! you really have no idea how you really affect me….and how hard this is for me…
hurting - gotta go.
